Scarlet of the Suicides
Scarlet: "Let me ask you a question. When you look around you, what do you see?"
Steve: "Objects, inanimate and animate."
Scarlet: “Would you say that you see things that appear dead and things that are alive?"
Steve: "Yeah, if you could say that a desk is dead, or that an electrical lamp is dead since it doesn't speak or move"
Scarlet: "What do you see happening to those things that seem alive?"
Steve: "I guess, they go around living their life, doing things until they die."
Scarlet: "Right, and who kills them?"
Steve: "Some die by circumstance or what some people call fate or old age and some get eaten or murdered by another thing that is alive."
Scarlet: "So, would you say that the world kills them?"
Steve: "Yeah, if by world we mean another object, animate or inanimate." Scarlet: "But did those objects want to die?"
Steve: "Most objects that are alive probably don’t want to die. Some of them might have wanted to die.”
Scarlet: "So some are killed by something else of this world, and all their lives most alive things want to live until they die what we would call a natural death, correct?"
Scarlet: "So in the case of human beings, what kills them is their own organism which has been set to die, or succumbs to death, depending on whether you take a theistic or atheistic view of God. (Pauses for a moment to gather her thoughts). Or another organism which kills the human being, i.e. in the form of another human being, animal, virus, or whatever else could kill us. "
Scarlet: "What do you think would happen if I were to not let any other object kill me, animate or inanimate, and also not allow myself to succumb to God's wishes for me to survive until he kills me?"
Steve: "In that case, well then you would live, wouldn't you.....but isn't that impossible though? You will eventually die.”
Scarlet: “But what would happen if instead of accepting my fate.....what if I were to take my own life, before God takes it? I mean, why are people so concerned about my staying alive? There are 7 billion people on the planet, and everyone is always competing over every thing. You've seen how they are on the outside, it's why you’re here in the first place, right?
Steve: “Yes, I mentioned to you yesterday, that I disliked the constant competition. I felt I couldn’t escape, everywhere I went, it didn't matter if I was working in fast food, slow food, retail, writing, or corporation, everybody was constantly at each other's throats. I think, it’s what caused my breakdown. I couldn’t even speak to anyone about it, because they would just laugh at me and give each other those knowing nods, as if to say “See I told you that he was weak. Survival of the Fittest my friends. He’s ‘obviously’ not meant to make it.”
Scarlet: “I know what you mean. Many of the successful are proud and haughty and come off cold and callous.”
Scarlet: “So then, you get what I'm saying right? Why do people want to prevent us from killing ourselves? Suicidal people do this competitive world a favor.
Steve: "Because they care about us."
Scarlet: "I want to tell you a secret."
Steve: "Please do.”
Scarlet leans in closer and whispers into Steve’s ear.
Scarlet: "The universe is a riddle. A riddle posed by God."
Scarlet fixes herself and gets up as if she’s going to give a presentation.
Scarlet: “The universe is a riddle. It is a riddle posed by a God. All of the universe is built in such a way as to make LIFE and all of its variations seem like such a miracle that it would be considered idiotic to go against this notion. LIFE is made to seem like what you should strive for, but I am telling you, that this very notion is a deception. An illusion!
Scarlet begins looking off into space as if she’s looking down the long corridors of time.
Scarlet: “Your parents meeting, mating and then your procreation. Before that, all the ancestors, the creatures’ histories and the history of the planet, then the history of the stars. All the way to the expansion after the big bang. How improbable for you to even exist! You must be a special snowflake then, huh? It’s all been building up to this special moment which you are part of.”
Scarlet looks at Steve and smiles
Scarlet: “You're familiar with that philosophy, right?
Steve: "Yes, it was interesting to see Dr. Brooklyn come to this realization in the Spymen by Falan Hoore."
Scarlet: "Yes, they place this LIFE philosophy in everything, and what a grand miracle it all is, to be alive and everything. Well, I’m telling you that these people are guilty of a vast deception! These people are magicians conjuring an illusion!"
Scarlet: "Well, they serve a purpose too. They are the guardians to the gates of godhood. They keep us from attaining our godhood."
Scarlet: "By placing these philosophies in everything, all media, and promulgating it, they make you a lover of LIFE, so that the very concept of going against LIFE is considered insane."
Steve: "And how would I go against LIFE? Didn't you just tell me that I had no choice and just have to go along with it, until I die, or I’m killed?"
Scarlet: "That's what I'm getting to. Everyone in society is attempting to prevent you from doing yourself in! They want you to allow yourself to die or be killed by other objects. Or, as I like to call it “death by the riddle creator”.
Steve: "So, you say."
Scarlet: "Yes, I say, and I figured out the reason!"
Scarlet: "The riddle creator does not want us to take our lives, because then he would have to admit us into the Godhead."
Steve: "And why would the riddle creator do that for us?
Scarlet: "The riddle creator is forced into granting us godhood because we figured out his riddle."
Steve: “Explain further”
Scarlet: "I will. God, I hate that I have to lead you by the hand, you would think that by now you could just logically deduce the rest."
Steve: "Guess, I'm not destined for godhood, am I?"
Scarlet: "You can thank me later, but honestly if you just think about it, you will realize why the riddle creator is forced to allow you into godhood. But since you're not clever enough to figure it out, I will go ahead and spell it out for you, but I am going to ask you some further questions to test you."
Steve: "I figured that you would."
Scarlet: "What goes hand in hand with creation?"
Scarlet: "Ehhh, wrong, but of course that's where your mind is. Come on, what is the opposite of creation?"
Steve: "Fuck, I know this.....this was on the SAT right? Can I use a lifeline? Just kidding, destruction. If you had asked me what the opposite of creation was first, then I would have answered with destruction."
Scarlet: "Exactly, none of us created ourselves, right? We're all here without a choice just getting through this right? No one I know, told their parents prior to their birth, hey, you guys should get it on, so that I can come in and play Wintendo."
Steve: "When you're right, you're right."
Scarlet: "Okay so now that we've established and agreed that none of us created ourselves.....what is the only godlike thing that is left for us to do?"
Scarlet: "Exactly.....and since Destruction is the opposite of Creation, then by virtue of it being one of God's powers in opposition, my partaking in my own destruction, is how I force God to grant me Godhood."
Steve: "You know, they would have really loved you in the philosophy department over at Berkley."
Scarlet: "I didn't create myself, but I destroyed myself. Destruction is always followed by creation. I am presented with the opportunity to nullify the chains that bind me here, by partaking in my own destruction!
Steve: "So, the riddle creator wants us to figure it, I mean, he wants US to figure this out?" Scarlet: "Yes, that's the whole purpose of the universe, it’s meant to fool you, so that only the wisest are allowed to enter into the Godhead. God doesn’t want any dumb nitwit to enter into the Godhead.” Steve: "Right, cause then you'd have a bunch of dim-witted Gods, and that would surely cause some sort of chaos in the God realm?"
Scarlet: "Are you being sarcastic!?"
Steve: “I’m being serious, you’re confusing me. All of this is way too much for me today. You’re lucky I’m even engaging you in this conversation.”
Scarlet: "The riddle creator views those who take their lives as the wise ones. We gain his favor by taking our lives and we are initiated into the Godhead. He has to, he’s forced, he has no choice."
Steve: "Jesus, no wonder you're in here."
Scarlet: "Yes, him too. He is another guardian of the gates to godhood."
Steve: "Cause he willingly goes to his death, and allows God to take him out?………thereby creating the example that we must suffer and allow God to do us in, even if the situation is an unjust one?"
Scarlet: "Great, glad to see you're awake."
Steve: "I hate to admit it, but you've really thought this through, huh Socrates?"
Scarlet: "And him as well."
Crosses her arms at him and closes her eyes nodding her head.
Steve: "No, cause he allows people to poison him, therefore he allows other objects to kill him.”
Scarlet: "No one forced him to drink the poison.”
Steve: "Huh? But he let people poison him!"
Scarlet: "Right, but no one forced him to drink the poison."
Steve: "Uh, yes they did." Scarlet: "Uh, no they didn't. If you read Plato, he mentions that Socrates' friends were ready to bail him out to another city where he could have lived until he died a natural death without being harassed or bothered."
Steve: "I guess I must have missed that dialogue."
Scarlet: "Well, it's there, trust me. I wouldn't mention it if it weren't. It's in one of his lesser-known works. Oooooh, did I tell you that I am writing a book called the Guardians and Inheritors of Godhood?"
Steve: "No, but you just did."
Scarlet: "That's why I’m always reading in here. Trying to gather all the material I need. I mean, I know that it's the TRUTH, but in order to convince others, you have to prove that it matches with previous philosophies and TRUTHS and what nots."
Steve: "Right, cause then it adds credence to your views if it's like endorsed by Plato and Jesus. Hey, maybe you could read some of Buddha's stuff, it would be cool you know to have Buddah kind of just with one of his arms outstretched on the front cover while another of his arms is holding a knife behind his back or something. Is he a guardian to godhood or an inheritor to godhood?"
Scarlet: "The Buddha was interesting, he kind of just lets people know that the physical world is filled with suffering and so you have to escape from it by reaching enlightenment which has to do with the acceptance of your physical mortality while realizing that everything here is illusion anyway, so death is most likely just another illusion. And that there is probably something beyond this, that is real, but I don't know if he ever mentions this."
Steve: "Are you sure that's what he taught."
Scarlet: "That's what I took from it. Anyways, my list isn't finished yet, I don't know if he's going to be a guardian or an inheritor. I still have lots to research before I release it."
Later on that week……
Scarlet: "Come on Steve! Think about it! Nerval did himself in, after his descent into what they called madness. The main protagonist of Goethe's character does himself in. What was the name of that book? The sorrows of young, something or other, I don't remember. Okay, but let's just focus on Nerval right now, he mentioned that he was having divine visions that were spilling into reality, right? You know about him, I know you do, cause you're a crazy poet right? That's why you're in here! Yeah, they told me about you too asshole! Anyways, he does himself in after these revelations, and guess who else does himself in? Jason Foster Wallets, and everybody knew he was a genius, cause they gave him that Mclaughlin scholarship thing that they give out to geniuses.....you know the lucky ones cause they think they're going to produce something for humanity or whatever. Anyways, I am compiling a list of geniuses who did themselves in, and then I am going to write a book called "The Inheritors of Godhood", and then just so I prove my point I am going to do myself in!”
Pauses here and looks towards Steve gauging his reaction
Scarlet continues: “You think it's pretentious don't you.....but it would be the ultimate signing off on my beliefs! Oh hey, you know who else is on the list? Socrates! Socrates made the list! I confirmed it after we had the discussion the other day. He could have escaped to another place, his friends were ready to bail him out, but noble Socrates, you know what he does, he willfully drank the hemlock, now if that isn't a big clue, I don't know what is. Don't you get it? That's why everything is vain, and all striving just makes you feel further and further away from your real goal, which is too off yourself! Hahaha, it's the ultimate cosmic joke, God is like, I'm going to send them all these clues, in the bible, telling them that they were sent there as a punishment, and then I'll send them Socrates, and Plato who talk about a cave everyone is in, and that those who actually get outside of the cave are the enlightened ones....what do you think the cave is!? This world you fool! That's the realization that they all eventually reached. Even the Samurai taught that life is a preparation for death, that everything in life is there to make you accept death, some accept it earlier than others, and the real wise ones, end themselves. It's like a big fuck you or laugh, depending on how you see it, to the creator of this place we all find ourselves in."
Steve: "You really think people are going to buy this shit?"
Scarlet: "Why not, people buy shit all the time!.....They do it to fill a hole, you fool. And besides, this isn’t shit. This is the TRUTH!"
Steve: "They should keep you in here and control all your communication."
Scarlet: "I'm smarter than them. I know how to act around them so that they let me get out of here."
Steve: "Oh yeah, then how come you haven't fooled them into letting you out then?" Scarlet: "Are you kidding me? You think I like to work? I'm lazy! They give me 3 meals in here and all the time I need to prepare this magnum opus of a book I’m working on, followed by a final act! One needs intense mental preparation for something like this. I must research enough and make sure that this is the truth. That's why I'm in here, you big dummy! Not everyone is a victim of the system and circumstances, like you! Scarlet: “You know your poetry's not half bad, you just suffer from your own hang-ups, but whatever, you should do like me and end it, but compose a work before you go.....Oooooh, you could write like a poetry book based off my philosophy! It could be like a companion piece to my Magnum Opus.....just think about it, two lovers who become geniuses in a madhouse, come to the realization that the riddle of the universe is to be solved by taking their lives!”
Scarlet looks over at Steve excitedly and Steve sits there frozen trying not to look uncomfortable.
Scarlet continues: “You know, that God sent Nerval a bird in his dream, to tell him that his life wasn't his to take.....that's how his descent into madness begins. It's like God, was seeing how smart Nerval was, like, let's see if he allows some dream bird to keep him from solving the riddle. God is a real comedian isn't he!? It just makes me laugh all day, as if a great genius like Nerval would let some stupid talking dream bird prevent him from taking his life."
Steve: "I am hearing you, and I appreciate your philosophy, but I'm not in the mood right now to be discussing someone else's ideas. I feel like a lead weight is being smashed into my mind as you're discussing your ideas. I am sorry I feel this way, and in my younger days, I might have fostered the arguments to talk you out of this conclusion that you've reached, but I really don't give a shit anymore. I also have a philosophy, and it involves letting the chips fall where they may. I think that I am just supposed to view this world and walk in it as a ghost, never affecting anything around me and not allowing anything to affect me, just observing, watching and letting all the play go on around me, like a dead spectator in a merry go round. Let everybody kill themselves and be done with it then, if that is how they feel, what do I care?"
Scarlet: "Jeeesus, you're the definition of lame. Not even lame, because the lame still walk. You are alive, yet dead, it's like you're too much of a coward to take your life, and you are content with just walking through this life and viewing the merry go round, and never even getting on a horse yourself. You won't let yourself be fooled by the merry go round, and yet you still don't have the balls to throw yourself off! At least I believe in something."
Steve: "Yeah whatever, even if what you say is true, maybe in my patience something will present itself on this merry go round that will make me believe in the play again."
Scarlet: "So you're just waiting for what, for God to send you an angel, a miracle or what? Here I am, telling you the secret to this joke and you think he's going to send you a miracle? You know what? I hope he does send you some stupid angel or miracle, so that in your stupidity you could misinterpret it, and then put all your life into its meaning, and then when you die and meet God at the end, thinking that you had read the miracle correctly, he could laugh at you and say, you should have listened to Scarlet!"
Steve: "Yeah, because Scarlet of the madhouse, has it all figured out. That's why she's in the madhouse! Hahahaha, you want a joke, I'll give you a joke! You're the joke, your life is the joke! So fuck you, why don't you go and kill yourself then, so that God could admit you into his Godhead, I bet he would too, because the God you believe in sounds just like the pretentious asshole you are!
Scarlet: "And that is why, I will be Godlike, and you will be a fucking shadow, still lumbering around, writing your stupid little verses, looking for approval from the other fucking shadows who haven't figured it out.” Scarlet: "Hey everyone, I don't care about anything but don't have the balls to end it, but here read my lyrics, please approve of me."
Scarlet laughs meanly.
Scarlet: "You're a fucking shadow."
Both Steve and Scarlet look visibly disturbed and stop talking for a short period.
Scarlet: "If you're lucky maybe God Scarlet will allow you to have life again as her pet dog so I can sink my godlike toenails into your flabby little tummy."
Steve: "Whatever, at least I'm not pretentious enough to think I solved the riddle of the universe! You know that God warns us about taking our lives and dangles images of Hell in front of us right? So what happens, if let's say little Scarlet who figured out the supposed riddle, gets to the pearly gates of the godhead, and God says ‘Hellfire for you! You pretentious little wench!’"
Scarlet: "That's why you're sheep. You think I haven't studied all the variations of hell? I know all about them. I come from a long line of scholarly people! Christ even went willingly to be killed by a mob of raving maniacs. So, where is his hell? If what you say is true, then why would God teach us that? You don't think Jesus could've escaped and hid away? He was Jesus! Instead, what does he do? He accepts his suicide. That is a willful suicide you shadow! If you allow people to kill you, you are still killing yourself! It's another piece in the grand riddle that I figured out."
Steve: “You’ve mentioned Jesus before. You already covered him.” Scarlet: “You know what brought him to my mind!? Sheep, the word sheep! I had to use Jesus to lure you into accepting my philosophy! That is why I used it, you fucking, baaa baaa sheep."
Steve: "You're so disrespectful, no wonder everyone avoids you here."
Scarlet: "I avoid them."
Steve: "Oh, okay God Scarlet, of the Godhead."
Scarlet: "Anyways, let me continue sermonizing, the truth that your God Scarlet has decided to graciously bestow upon your little sheep mind. Settle down kid, oh wait that's a goat, and goat you are not, (snickers in laughter). Jesus, (raising her right eye pridefully on her madhouse companion) was admitted into the Godhead after this suicide, was he not!? That is how God became 3. So, there you have it! You wanna be a poet right!? There is a truth worthy of a tome of poetry! Have at it, you ungrateful wretch, go ahead and write your opus then, you can thank me by kneeling in front of me and bathing my feet in tears as consecration for bestowing my wisdom on you! The wisdom of your soon to be goddess, Scarlet."
Steve: "You're crazy enough to actually appeal to some of those crazies out there. I mean if Flicky can have people twerking their butts on videos for likes, I'm sure people killing themselves won't be too hard, especially if you bring Jesus into it."
Scarlet: "Now you're thinking. Although I have never heard the term twerking and Jesus in the same sentence before, you glorious poet you! See, my wisdom is already having its effects on you.
Steve: "Whatever, this is just going to be another chapter in my crazy life, thank you for the conversation (sarcastically). You're fucking dangerous."
Scarlet: "Am I not to be considered fearful, if I am about to be merged into the awesome power of the Godhead?"
Steve: "Oh, God, yes, just leave me alone." (Visible shakes, feigning fear, then leaves to curl up in his bed)
(Scarlet is left, clipping her toenails, hair in curls)
Later that night
Steve: "I found a fatal flaw in your argument DemiGod! Hahaha, now you're just a demigod, cause you have a flaw in your argument. An Achilles heel!”
Steve laughs a little, pleased with himself.
Scarlet: "Okay, shadow steve, or should I call you steeeevie (enunciates it in a high nasally voice mockingly)"
Steve: "If God wants us to do ourselves in, using our minds as you have, to come to this conclusion. Why wouldn't Jesus, just take his own life. Like, before the Romans or the Pharisees got to him or whatever."
(Scarlet mockingly, starts shaking in her chair acting like she's a robot and that there's been a malfunction in her circuitry)
Scarlet: "Steeevie, has figured me out (robot voice), this contradiction has ruined my circuitreeeee." (Pretends to keel over, into an inanimate object, then comes back alive, in a funny reverse manner, that makes Steve laugh against his annoyance)
Scarlet: "Actually, that would have been too easy. That's like God presenting you the solution right at the question. He wants you to earn the Godhead, Steeeevie, earn it. You think he wants some nitwit who needed someone to take him by the hand and point everything out to him to join the divine godhead? That's why, Jesus willingly let's others take his life, so that the question becomes "Did I take my own life by allowing others to kill me? Or did others kill me, and it wasn't a suicide?" This is where God divides, those destined for the Godhead, and those who are like you, the shadows. You said it yourself earlier, you just go around letting life happen to you, not really participating in it, but giving it the authority to kill you in the end. That doesn't really make sense either, does it? So, this is how God divides the shades from the future gods.”
Scarlet notices that Steve looks confused
Scarlet: “I think I'll sum it up for you in a way that Hollywood could place as a nice little tagline for a movie. YOU EITHER HAPPEN TO LIFE, OR YOU LET LIFE HAPPEN TO YOU." (Steve, is visibly shaken, a bit exasperated, confused and a little bit in awe)
Steve: "I think that your future church will have many people who join. Do you think that Tim Bones will be a greater god than you, since he convinced others to die with him?”
Scarlet: "That's why I'm disseminating my Final Testament after my death. If I convince others, I then become a liberating God and am responsible for other's godliness, which in turn creates servant gods for me to do my bidding.”
Scarlet: “You better drink some of this kool-aid early so that I allow you to exist as my servant god dog. Don't say I didn't warn you, I might still allow you to have inside access on the ground floor before the stock goes public."
Steve: "You're fucking nuts, but I like the way you think. I think you're messing with me for kicks and giggles. That's why I indulge you in these talks, which I also enjoy better than listening to old Larry drooling and making startled noises in the corner every time I try and get him to join in on a movie. I hope that you are messing with me because there might be hope for you as an entertainer out there in the world of shade and illusion."
Scarlet: "And wouldn't that just be amazing!? I get to be inside an illusion within an illusion, 3 times removed from the Godhead!"
Steve: "You could be like one of those Russian dolls, trapped under the illusion of the illusion that is entertainment, keeping all the shades from realizing their true purpose in life, which is, of course, to OFF themselves.
Scarlet: "I knew you'd get it. That's why I chose you to be my first apostle."
Steve: "Do I have to name it the Gospel of Steve, or can I name it the Gospel of Steeeevie (nasally high voice)."
Scarlet: “I think I will allow you to decide that, but honestly I just care that you get the message right. Disseminate it only among the worthy, for I Scarlet, soon to be God Scarlet, can not be bothered by such trivialities (accentuates tri). Do as you please god dog Steeeevie." Steve: "I think I'm going to take myself for a walk around the asylum now, is that okay with you God Master?"
Scarlet: "I will allow it." (flicks her hand dismissively)
CometBucks (Dali Café)
Some time has passed since Steve and Scarlet have been in the asylum.
Steve walks out of an office, he is closing the door behind him, but the office is official looking and law degrees could be seen on the wall in the background. He is holding a black and red leather-bound book, that states, the final testament of Scarlet.
Footage of Steve driving home
Cuts of a lawyer saying the words:
"She wanted you to have this. She mentioned that you would know what to do with it."
Cuts of his own voice:
"Are you sure? I only knew her a little while, feels like lifetimes though."
Steve gets home with the book gripped tightly in his hand. He falls asleep with the testament next to his pillow.
Cuts to Stevie at a coffee shop with a friend of his
Steve: "I just don't know WHY she chose me, I mean she always joked about this, but I thought she was just fucking with me. I never thought she would actually do it."
Rob: "So you thought she was just fucking with you cause you believe in Jesus and all that stuff, or just to poke fun at you?"
Steve: "Yeah, I mean look you didn't know her, she was the type to do that shit."
Rob: "Doesn't sound too nice to me."
Steve: "Anyways, that's why I never challenged her enough. I just laughed it off, like yeah sure go ahead. Plus, she would laugh with me all the time about this shit. So I thought it was a joke.”
Rob: "You sure know how to pick them."
Steve: "Don't give me that shit. She HAPPENED to me, I didn't happen to her. I was a fucking shade in her crazy world. I was in shade mode, I didn't choose anything." Rob: "You're a fucking fatalist man, that's your problem. Always complaining about shit happening to you. That's why she HAPPENED to you, don't you see? Look, I know it sounds selfish, but just listen to me.”
Rob pauses and looks at Steve to make sure he’s going to let him continue